13w0d (March 20, 2016)

OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG.


The first trimester is DONE. I can't believe it. I'm so happy and thankful to have gotten this far...I just keep praying every day that things keep going well and the little peanut keeps growing, big and strong!


Everything has started to get better - my nausea has tapered off, my energy is coming back and I started to sleep a lot better (for now). I get nervous though because some days it doesn't feel like I'm pregnant anymore...I mean, I know that's silly but, I forget sometimes. Well, for like a millisecond. I even asked some friends if that was normal and they keep telling me that the second trimester is the best...I'm just ready for my belly to pop. I want it to look like I'm prego instead of just gaining weight :) Ha!


We did start taking bi-weekly bumpies -- I have added a first trimester "Page" at the top of the blog if you want to see some progress pics!


Other than that, I don't have much to report...I'm scheduled to see my OB every 3-4 weeks. Technically, we're "high risk" but not really...everything is normal with the pregnancy but since we went through all the IVF and specialty procedures, we get categorized as that. Like I said before, our OB is great...he told me that right now I'm in a phase where I'm starting to feel better but I still can't feel the baby because it's too early. So, if I ever get nervous to just come on in and hear the heartbeat! He's so understanding. Just love it!


Now that I'm feeling better, I'm really going to try and eat well and make better decisions. When I wasn't feeling good, I ate whatever I wanted and didn't have a care in the world...I just wanted comfort food and junk. So, lets see if I can make better decisions :)


Well, I think we're all caught up now...sorry for the delay with posts but I wanted to be sure we got to a good place before I told the world what was happening. Please keep sending many thoughts and prayers this way that all goes well and smoothly. We've waited so long to get to this point and I'm so thankful for everyone's support!

Normal? Wha?!?!?! (May 5, 2016)

Well, we have been considered "normal" for a week now...they released us from the clinic and have since did our first OB introduction and are meeting with our "real" doctor today. I still can't believe it -- they took me off all of my medicine on Saturday. It feels so weird...I mean, I've been doing shots since January so to get home from work and NOT prep for an injection feels odd. I even went to bed the first couple nights thinking, "WHOOPS! I FORGOT!" but then hubby had to remind me that we aren't doing them anymore. I was really nervous... scared that the baby wouldn't make it without the injections since they quit everything cold turkey. But, they tested my blood and there was a jump in my levels which proved to the docs that I was good to go and be done. Since I was nervous, I talked to M, I emailed Miss N, I texted Risa...I googled tons of information. Lots of people quit cold turkey after 10 weeks, some taper off between 10 and 11 weeks, and some higher risk patients stay on until 13 weeks. But, since we're not considered "high risk" (thank goodness), we were able to just quit. Lots of information online said that if people had signs of distress, aka spotting, cramping, etc. to take an injection and call the doctor ASAP but that didn't happen for us....so we went on as normal.


We went to our "real" OB appointment -- hubby came with and tried playing with every single thing he could touch in the room while we waited for the doctor. One nurse checked us in and she wasn't very pleasant...but, after that we waited and waited and waited for the doctor. He probably didn't come in for a good 30 minutes. But, then he knocked and popped in -- he was wearing a little red bow tie and was very quirky but likeable. We were referred to our OB from a close friend who had nothing but great things to say...so we figured this would be a good fit and it was close to home. We went over soooo many thing, details, testing, schedules, histories, etc. Then he popped me up on the table and said, "Let's listen to the heartbeat!"


Now, we've seen the heartbeat twice, but we've never heard it. We have never known the beats per minute. At our specialty clinic, they showed it to you and let you know if it was normal or not, but we never got to hear it. The doc had this little handheld Doppler...it almost looked like a walkie talkie. Ha! He lubed up my lower abdomen and put the microphone on my skin...he felt around for a while but I wasn't nervous. People said it tends to take some time and we were only 11 weeks. He showed me what the sound of the fluid in my uterus was like and then he closed his eyes and was really "into it" -- then he was like "THERE! Do you hear it?!" I was chuckling inside because he was so serious yet super pumped...honestly, it didn't sound much different than what he had me listen to previously but, I read the Doppler and it said 163 bpm. Our little peanut has a heart beat of 163 beats per minute!!! Wow. I couldn't believe it! I yelled over to hubby (who was right there so I really didn't have to yell), "DO YOU HEAR IT!?!" He smiled and said, "Yes, dear."


After that, everything was a blur...we went through more details, did a pap smear, cervix examine, breast exam, etc. Then he told me I could come back anytime to hear the heartbeat and it wouldn't cost anything more, it could be just for fun as all was normal. So, I'm scheduled to come back on the 23rd. They did have some trouble getting my charts and records from our specialty clinic so when I come back, I'm going to bring my ultrasounds, just in case.  


Wow. I can't believe this! So exciting :)

10w0d - Second Ultrasound (April 29, 2016)

Well, the nausea has decided to stay and keep me company....I have only thrown up once though. I'm not sure if it was because of the baby or because I came down with another LOVELY cold and I was trying to hack up a lung...but, I did puke. Other than the nausea, being super tired, and craving everything sweet -- maple donuts, cookies, gummy candy, etc. along with wanting to eat everything else in site, too, things are going good.


Today is my last ultrasound at our specialty clinic...this time, we got to the appointment and hubby wasn't late. We actually walked up together and I wasn't nervous at all. I went to the bathroom, got checked in and we were called back pretty quick. This time the tech was Kara and she's pretty cool -- she's the one who did my ultrasound on my bday with the good lining news!


We got all situated and Dr. C came in -- he was just giddy was excitement. So, you know the drill...insert probe now. Tada!! There is our little peanut...it was doing a dance, squirming and wiggling all around. Kara said, "You have got a wiggly little one in there!" The legs were kicking and twisting...must have been happy to see us all!


Here are some pics -- they did a 3D version today so it really looks like a BABY!



This last one is my favorite -- it's the side profile... you can see the head, the little button nose, arms, legs and the umbilical cord. I'm just in LOVE. The little peanut is now measuring a day ahead of schedule - 10w1d: 36mm/1.42 inches!!


After all was said and done, Dr. C sat with us...told me that he's taking me off of pelvic rest and we can now do everything normal like we used to -- exercise, whoopie ;)...he basically said that we can't screw this up. He also told me that he was going to test my blood and then most likely take me off of all supplementary medicine on Saturday/tomorrow -- no more injections, no more estrogen, no more progesterone...I couldn't believe it. I asked him if he was sure and said that the placenta should now me making it's own hormones and I will no longer need to take any extras. Crazy. It's hard to trust this process but it was built to work...so we just need believe. He also said we were done at the clinic and next week, I need to see my "real" OB and that we were now normal people. OMG. Dr. C did apologize for the process and it taking longer than expected but he asked us to send a birth announcement when the little "turkey" popped out on Thanksgiving!! We're going to have a Thanksgiving baby!!!


Baby G DUE NOVEMBER 24th - Thanksgiving DAY!! WHAT A BLESSING and miracle to be thankful for this year!!

8w0d - First Ultrasound (April 15, 2016)

Well, I was nervous because I hadn't felt an ounce of nausea yet and many people report starting to get those symptoms around 6+ weeks...I was eating whatever I wanted and going to the bathroom a lot, still super tired and had crazy tender breasticles, but no nausea....UNTIL I got back from TX. Then it just hit me. I wasn't throwing up but man o man was I not feeling good. I'd be fine in the morning but by around 2pm it would hit me...then, it would last all night. So, I'd get home and just be worthless....my poor hubby. AND then the mood swings...oh the lovely mood swings. Now, I'm already a super sensitive person but geesh, I'd cry at anything...commercials, animals outside, the wind...good Lord. Then, it would switch to anger...everything just pissed me OFF. Blah....so, I guess I'm really prego. Ha!


With that being said, we had our first ultrasound today... I was soooooo nervous. OMG. This was it. This would tell us...SHOW us if this transfer really worked and whether or not there was a baby inside of me. We got to the clinic and of course my hubby was supposed to meet me there and he was late. I freaked out. I called. I texted. I called. I texted. He finally told me he was almost there so I went upstairs, went to the bathroom and waited. They called me back and hubby was still not there...so they took me back anyway and said they would find him before the doctor came in.


Hubby finally arrived and they sent him back into the room where I was half naked sitting on the table. Julie was our ultrasound tech and she's awesome -- she has been working with us the whole time we have been here, just like Heather. It's so nice to have people who want you to be successful and who are rooting for you around!


Dr. E came in and she was the one who did our actual transfer so it was nice to see her again...you could tell she was excited so we got on with it. As soon as they stuck the probe up in there, I saw a blob. It was different than seeing my normal uterus with a lining in it, it was literally a little round blob of white. Dr. E asked us, she said "Do you see it? That's your baby!" You could see the heart working and pumping, you could see the little nubs where arms and legs would soon sprout. You could see the head and umbilical cord. OMG this was really happening...and of course, I started crying and convulsing on the table yet again...so much so that Julie couldn't get a good measurement/reading until I settled down. The little peanut was measuring exactly 8w0d -- 17mm/0.67 inches.


Dr. E looked at my hubby and said, "There is a baby in there!" and all hubby could say was..."I see it." Ha! I told her that we were all in a little shock that this was happening. She told us, "Good job! You did it!" and I looked at her and said, "No... Good job to you! YOU did it!" and we all laughed. Oh happy day...She told us we can come back at 10w0d, have our last ultrasound and say good bye to Dr. C because if all is good, that's when they will kick us out of the clinic and we turn into normal people...can you believe it??


Here you go - here's our little peanut!

Texas Travel for Work....and I'm 7 weeks pregnant.

Well, BETA#3 is complete...I'm waiting to have my first ultrasound on the 15th...and guess what? I have to travel for work....CRAZY. I asked the docs if it was OK and they said it was just fine but to be sure to get lots of water and walk around on the plane if I could. I had to travel to Texas for the biggest tradeshow of the year -- this show is a booze filled party and of course, I can't drink because I'M ALMOST SEVEN WEEKS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Now, if any one was good at keeping secrets, it's me...but when it's a fun, happy, exciting secret...it's REALLY HARD to keep. Especially because I'm a skilled drinker and the life of the party! So, I traveled for work...I got on the plane, brought all my injectable medicine through security (I was scared about that but it went just fine, no questions asked), got the TX and checked into my hotel. I met all our other co-workers -- some came from home, some from other states.


Surprisingly, the week actually went well, I did have to fill in a few folks on the secret so they could help get me "fake" drinks while out with customers and other co-workers so no suspicions were risen. Vodka, soda water and a lime for me please, hold the Vodka! I called the "I'm super tired" card a lot of the time so I didn't have to worry about staying out late and I had to make sure I stayed on schedule for my meds...by the end of the week, I was excited to be done.


Instead of going home, I actually was able to head down to Austin to visit one of my best friends -- she knew about the secret so didn't have to worry about spilling the beans with her! Instead, we decided to eat our lives away...have you ever heard of Gourdoughs?? It's a donut FOOD TRUCK. Yes, we indulged here. OMG.

It was a great trip and I'm glad I had something to do in between my betas and that first ultrasound....now, only a few more days to go :)

19dp5dt - BETA #3 (March 28, 2016)

15dp5dt thru 18dp5dt - Ok, I'm done taking pregnancy pee tests. If I take another one, my husband will disown me! Haven't had any more spotting but I'm sooooooooo tired. I go to work, come home, take a nap, eat food, and go to bed for the night. Then wake up to potty 2-3 times a night and do it all over again. Still trying to lay low and take it easy -- the doctor has me on pelvic rest just as a precautionary measure to ensure nothing disrupts my uterus. My poor hubby.... ;)


19dp5dt - Today is my last BETA....if all is good, I will come back on April 15th for my first ultrasound! I went into the clinic, same old same old...got my poke and left. That was it. So anti-climactic. I wish they were able to give the test results just right then and there but no. So I waited until the afternoon to get the call.


Theresa called with the number....are you ready for it??




3553


OH. MY. GOSH.


So, the numbers went from 120 to 297 to 3553!!


The docs told me everything looked awesome and gave me lots of congratulations - they said to keep doing everything just like we have been doing and that this was a huge success. My progesterone was 17.2 and I asked if that was too low and Theresa said it was just fine. Dr. C was not concerned about it at all -- I emailed N just to get her consensus and she said this was totally great and she wasn't concerned about the progesterone either since it was going up on it's own. She said I'm picking up steam and I am right where I should be -- HURRAH is an understatement!

12dp5dt...BETA #2 (March 21, 2016)

10dp5dt - keep taking more HPTs, just to be safe. Still says YES. Feeling better but laying low to get over my cold. Decided to clean the house a little...super tired. Took a nap.

11dp5dt - Sunday Fun Day, NOT - had to go to fish fry at my hubby's grandparents house. All the relatives were there. I was cranky and tired...plus we had to bring the dogs and hubby was supposed to be in charge but was not. Completely pissed me off and stressed me out...which, ya know is lovely, for this little peanut. Got mad. ARG. Went home to take a nap...Still took an HPT, we're good.

12dpt5dt (morning) - Beta #2 day...went to the clinic, drew blood, used my right arm instead of the left one since it was bruised from 9dp5dt. Praying for a good number....went back to work. Trying to keep busy.

12dp5dt (afternoon) - Got the call....we're up to 297!!!!!! More than doubled from last week...WHOOP!! They said all my counts were great and things look phenomenal. So, they want me to schedule a 3rd Beta for next week and then 3 weeks from now, do my FIRST OB ULTRASOUND. EEEEEEEKKKKK CRAY CRAY. OMG OMG OMG. Talked to scheduling...3rd beta is scheduled for 3/28/16. Ultrasound is scheduled the week of April 11th.

We have customers in town this week and I haven't been feeling the best..so I totally bailed on going out with them and pulled the sick card. Whoops.

12dp5dt (evening) - AGHHHHHH. I spotted. WHAT THE HELL. I'm frantically crying....don't know what to do. Don't want to lose the little peanut. WHAT THE F! It wasn't much, just once when I went potty...on the tissue, there was bright pink blood. Then that was that. It wasn't continuous or heavy...and never happened again. Called M, texted M, text Risa, Texted my bestie....WHAT THE F!! Called the clinic and left a message...

13dp5dt - took another test, just to be safe....still there. Got a call back from the clinic around 10am. They are not concerned at all...said many women spot randomly especially during their first 10 weeks. Nothing to be worried about unless it's continuously heavy - they even said if I fill up more than one pad per hour, to let them know but anything less than that, isn't a concern. I literally was like ummm...yea, no. It was only once on a tissue. They still don't want me to come in until Monday and told me to just take it easy and drink lots of water. Things will be just fine. NO STRESS. I emailed Miss N, just to be sure...she keeps me sane...she does, of course. Don't know what I'd do without her...OMG. Really.

More customers were in tonight...still not feeling good, stayed home. SOOOOO Tired. Went to bed by 8:15...started having crazy dreams and woke up at 3am craving a big glass of milk. Odd. I haven't drank real milk in 10 years....have a slight milk allergy.

14dp5dt - back to work...having some trouble with nausea today... people are asking questions as to why I'm always sick or not feeling well. They are getting nosy. Oh yea, did I tell you? I took another test this morning....yup, still prego. Hubby got mad and schooled me on HPTs...asked me why I'm taking so many and if I read the labels because if I did, I would know they are 99.9% accurate. If I took 100 tests, the possibility of one being off is very narrow. He's such an engineer. I told him I was getting them at Walmart for 6 bucks and they were 3 packs!!!! haha Nerves have settled...no more spotting issues. All is ok.

9dp5dt - BETA #1 (March 18, 2016)

Bahhh finally slept all night but woke up around 4am with a stupid ear ache. This darn cold...I suppose, since I can't take any meds, all the fluid in my head is pooling around my ear canals...but, I still had time to POAS this morning. STILL POSITIVE.

I didn't even have to wait for a line today, it just came up right away...crazy! Went in early to get my blood drawn for the beta/hcg test...waiting for the doctor to call with the news. Also, when they do call, I'm totally going to ask about this stupid cold. OMG. AWFUL.

I got the call this afternoon and of course I was in a car full of co-workers for lunch! I took the call regardless and had to "play it cool." I'm sure the doc was a little surprised that I wasn't freaking out...but he gave me the results and told me to get scheduled to come in for BETA #2 on Monday.

Are you ready for it????

He told me I had a great number for day 9 post transfer and my HCG was at 120!! My progesterone was at 15.8.

I completely blanked out...forgot to ask about my cold, my thyroid, scheduling my next appointment...so as soon as I got back to the office, I called the clinic back and got my next test scheduled for Monday at 8:40am. I also talked to the nurse about my cold and thyroid...They did tell me if I feel like I'm getting an ear infection or have a fever that lasts more than a couple days, I need to go to my general practitioner and get put on an antibiotic. The nurse said to make sure I tell them I'm pregnant....SAY WHAT? I asked her to say it again. She said to tell them I AM PREGNANT and they should know the proper medicine to put me on to not endanger the little peanut. If it is bacterial, it needs to be treated...versus a viral infection. So, we should be good to go! Phfeww!!

Pray for a good BETA #2!

Waiting...TWW

The dreaded two week (or 9 day) wait....here is a play by play for you to follow along :)

0dp5dt - bed rest, Netflix binging, lower abdomen aching, stomach bloating, extremely tired

1dp5dt - bed rest, more Netflix binging, constant lower abdomen aching, pricks on lower left side of abdomen, bloating, very tired

2dp5dt - back to work but working from home, still achy in lower abdomen, bloating, Dad is in town visiting, still tired

3dp5dt - weekend, still achy in abdomen, company all weekend and had to say no to liquor, bloating, yup...still tired

4dp5dt - weekend, still achy in abdomen, nauteaous in the morning...not sure why, got better after I ate. Company left...slept all afternoon

5dp5dt - back to work...still bloated and a little nauteaous but must be coming down with a cold. Starting to get a scratchy throat and a cough. Faint aches in lower abdomen. Still tired...slept when I got home from work for 3 hours then went to bed.

6dp5dt - finally feeling less bloated but still somewhat achy. Feeling better with my cold but still not back to normal. Found an expired HPT from college and decided to POAS...got a BFN. Should've known better...it's too early. Trying to keep my hopes up and tell myself I should've waited. Trying not to stress out.. had to email Miss N in order to relax.

7dp5dt (morning) - less bloated but still a little achy in my lower abdomen. Went to work but feel worse today then yesterday with my cold... can't stop coughing and I feel like I'm going to hurt the little peanut. Decided to take a half day and go home and rest. Felt great to snooze and not worry about emails. Stopped by Target and bought more HPTs... debating when/if I should try to POAS again...I'm nervous. Some people would've gotten good results yesterday and now there is conflicting info about day 7. M says to wait until tomorrow...blood test is Friday.

7dp5dt (afternoon) - decided to just do it and take a test. I chose the digital one too and apparently I was supposed to start with the line tests?? But, I couldn't wait anymore....3 minutes could never be so long but....BFP. OMG. IT'S POSITIVE. Hubby doesn't want to see it because he's an engineer and said the blood test is the true telling factor. But he did get a little excited then tucked it back in...I on the other hand, am ecstatic! OMG. BFP.

8dp5dt - woke up feeling great (but still have my stupid cold) - took another HPT, this time I did the line test...barely had to wait a minute before the other line to pop up. BFP. Still positive! Went to work happy as a clam...excited for Friday and what the beta will be. Got home from work feeling sicker than a dog...laid down, coughed up a lung, held my lower abdomen thinking that would help secure the little peanut. Blew my nose raw and did a neti pot...lovely.

Can't believe this is really happening!!!

4dp5dt (March 13, 2016)

Well, the weekend went by without a hitch...my dad came to visit and I didn't drink (duh) but he didn't ask questions either. It was very pleasant and relaxing but I still had constant cramping and little pricklies. I was super tired too so it was hard to keep up with the busy-ness...but it did keep me distracted. We actually sold our house, so the weekend was spent house hunting and shopping along with eating.

I did wake up this morning and actually felt icky...I'm not sure what it was but, I was super nauseous. I am not sure if I was hungry or if I ate something bad. But, I don't think I could be pukey 4 days in...right? Maybe I'm coming down with something...I hope not.

I have this week, until Friday, to stay busy and keep my mind off of things. Miss N gave us some great gratitude activities that I'm going to try...I wonder how long you have to wait until we can test ourselves aka POAS...Some of my friends have said 6 days post transfer, some say 7. Some say to just wait until the blood draw...but I feel like it might ease my nerves to know if it did or didn't take before the blood draw.

Just to give you an idea of what is going on...here is a chart:



Positive Thoughts everyone!!!

Bed Rest aka Couch Rest (March 10, 2016)

So, it's Bed Rest Time....aka Couch rest. 2 days off of work were calling my name and I wasn't stressed at ALL. They told me to lay low the day of the transfer and get back at it after 24 hours...but, then one nurse said 24-36 hours, one said 48, one said just the day...so I laid low for two days. I binged on Netflix and Amazon Prime...nothing like marathons of When Calls the Heart and Downton Abbey :)

I didn't Google anything, didn't research anything...I just CHILLED. They say this is hard for some people...they say that people can't stop stressing out about the transfer, work, life...but, I had a hay day. I almost was more excited NOT to go to work than the transfer. JUST kidding. But, seriously. It was great. I napped, I ate, I slept. I breathed.

I still can't believe it...I was impregnated yesterday. Today I am...1dp5dt. Is that right? Haha. I'm not good with all the terms.

So far, I've been crampy/achy...like I'm getting a menstrual period. It's pretty constant. I've had little pricks in my lower left abdomen and have been very sleepy. Again, trying not to read into anything but....we CAN be cautiously optimistic.





March 18th is the day we go back in for blood work....what am I going to do with myself until then???

The only thing I was little nervous about was we were planning to have my Dad as company this weekend and he's going to be wondering WHY I'm not drinking, because let's face it, I'm an avid drinker...but, we'll cross that bridge when come to it. Peace.

Transfer Day (March 9, 2016)

I can't believe it....today is transfer day.

I took today off from work... and also plan to have PTO on Thursday. I'll work from home on Friday, too, just to be safe and stress free. Hubby had the day off too....so, last night we ordered take out, drank a whole bottle of wine and cheers to the "last supper." We slept in this morning...my transfer was scheduled for 12:45PM, so we had the whole morning to relax, drink coffee and be with each other. Miss N was also planning to do acupuncture before and after the transfer, so our plan was to meet her at the clinic at 11:15 to get started. We were so excited (hubby was a little nervous)...

I had everything ready the day before...I cleaned the house, went shopping and picked up some food that would be easy to cook or reheat when I was on bed rest after the transfer. I prepped my meds, water and everything I needed to bring with to the clinic. My Valium was laid out, my bendy straws, my Vitamin water...so, we left the house without a hitch. Made our way to the clinic and checked in. We let them know that we were checking for our FET and of course the receptionists just treated it like any other day...I mean, they deal with this every day and see me every week, so same old, same old. But, I didn't let that bog me down...we also told them we were meeting with Miss N before and after. They went to try and find her but of course couldn't... I heard them talking and apparently the new people didn't know what she looked like and had to have someone else find her. I just texted her and let her know we were here...lets just cut out the middle man. Miss N came to get up....she was in scrubs and I barely recognized her. Then it started to sink in...this is the day. She took us back to the IVF suite and we got our scrubs. I had to get the lovely hospital gown with the opening in the back. They made me wear one that was open in the back and one like a house coat so I didn't display my dairy air. We met the IVF nurse that was going to be in on the transfer and she explained to us a few details...everything felt so calm and stress free. I couldn't get the smile off of my face.

We got all situated in the Acupuncture room...the lights were dim and instrumental music was playing. Miss N explained the process, what was going to happen, the details and science behind it all. Then we got to the needles...Hubby was in the room too and I asked Miss N if she could give him some needles to calm down :) But, she couldn't of course. As soon as the needles were in, she left the room so we could have some "alone time." As soon as she left, Hubby kept messing with the fricken needles!! He's like "What if I do this? Can I touch that?" He was fiddling with everything...I literally was like, "WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE RELAXING!"

10 minutes later, I took my Valium (one hour before the actual transfer) and drank all my water to fill up my bladder. They wanted it nice and full because it helps with the ultrasound when actually putting the embryo in my uterus. After about 30 minutes, Miss N came back in and removed the needles and then gave me a lovely massage until the nurse came to get us. During this time, Hubby and I were holding hands and relaxing. All of a sudden, a song came on the speakers...and I couldn't believe my ears. It was the instrumental version of our wedding song....cue the waterworks. Everyone is crying. I couldn't believe it. It was a sign...this was it. This was the time. This is our time. We are finally here and we are ready.

I'm bawling just writing this darn post.

So, the nurse came in to get us...she brought us just next door and we were situated. There was literally a "drive thru" window in the room where all the embryos were stored. The doctor came in and it was Dr. E, a lady :), who was extremely soft-hearted and excited for our big day. She spoke calmly and clearly and reassured us that all will be great. She let us know that the thaw went perfectly...we decided to just do one embryo instead of two for transferring after speaking to our Doctor. We had a beautiful stage 5 blastocyst embryo just waiting to get into my soft, cushy uterine lining. She handed us a picture of our little peanut and I was just in shock...this is my little peanut, our little peanut. 

By this time, my Valium is kicking in more and I have to pee but it didn't matter...there was so much adrenaline running through my body, I didn't have a care in the world. THEN, Heather came in to be the tech for ultrasound during the transfer and I just squealed :) As you know, she is the best and it was so nice to have yet another familiar face in the room. The drive through window opened and another tech came in asking for confirmations, dates of birth/names, etc. They put an ankle medical bracelet on my leg (I felt like I was getting bagged). Then all was a go. It was time. Insert speculum now. That was probably the worst part about it all...and my full bladder that was about to burst. 

Heather checked my bladder, good and full (I could've told her that!). Then they did a trial transfer to make sure the doctor entered my uterus correctly and had a clear view of the end goal. It went perfectly. Nice and straight. No problems. They complimented me on my beautiful uterus again...this seems to be a recurring theme. I'm not sure what they mean when they say that...but, I guess it's pretty. The tech in the drive thru gave Dr. E the catheter with our little peanut...I wanted to yell at her to not F it up, but it all went so quickly. I barely knew they were doing anything. I could see the burst of fluid that comes out of the catheter when they inserted it into my body, but other than that...nothing. She told me they were done and I was like "What?! I'm pregnant now??" They checked the catheter just to make sure the embryo did exit properly...only a microscope could verify those details and it did. Our little peanut was home...in my uterine lining. Ready for a 9 month stay (fingers crossed). 

They made me stay there for about 10 minutes, laying down, and then had me go empty my bladder. I know this isn't how it works, but I kept thinking...if I pee, it's going to fall out!! Miss N took us back into her room, we finished our acupuncture and then hubby took me home for some much deserved bed rest aka couch fest.

 

OMG. I was impregnated today! Meet our Little Peanut :) 

Sorry, I didn't show you our faces :) Confidentiality, ya know! But, I still love you all - thanks for your support!

Day 20 - One Last Check! (March 8, 2016)

Day 20 - March 8th, 2016 - One last check...

You'd think I would be nervous...but, I was actually OK. I went to work super early because they could only get my in later on in the morning so instead of staying home and going to work after, I decided to go in. It was helpful because I didn't sit and think about the what-ifs, I kept busy and left the office when needed.

I got to the clinic and went to the bathroom because everyone knows that my bladder is an entirely different being and likes to overfill with no warning. I sat down ready to wait and funny thing is, I didn't have to wait long. Heather peeked her head around the corner and said, "We're ready for you!" I was so happy and relieved to see her...she is the best tech by far. I even told her I already went to the bathroom and she smiled, apologetically, for last week's ordeal.

I got to the room and I swear my shoes were off before she even shut the door...again, you all know the drill. I sat my bare bum on the table and prayed to have a good nurse. I did -- Dori and Heather walked back in to the room and got the show on the road. Dori has always been super supportive too and a little fun. Insert probe now....I looked at the screen, Heather pushed on my tummy a little to get a better read. Then we watched...the millimeters went up....

4mm..............5mm...............6mm............6.5mm.............7mm...........7.5MM.................8MM......OMG.

EIGHT MILLIMETERS!!!!!!!!! 8 MM!!!!!!!!!

WE ARE AT 8 MM!!!!!!!!!! This is the thickest my lining has EVER been. I MEAN EVER. OMG OMG OMG. 8MM!!!!!!!

Heather confirmed, 8mm; Dori said we're GOLDEN - Transfer is tomorrow! Before she could even get that lovely stick out of my goods, by body started convulsing on the table...I was crying, happy tears of course. As soon as Heather cleaned up, I sat up and all three of us bounced off the walls a little...jumped for JOY, we hugged. Heather has seen my lining at the beginning when it was the very worst, the middle with the rollercoasters of readings, and now the good. WE ARE HERE. Dori put her hand on my shoulder and asked if I was going to be able to go back to work..and I told her, YES.YES.YES. These are happy tears....two years later, we are here. TOMORROW IS TRANSFER DAY. OMG. 

Day 14 - It's a go! (March 2, 2016)

OMG. It's Day 14.

DAY 14. This is one of the biggest milestone days we have encountered in some time... This was the day that would tell us if we were actually moving forward with our FET transfer. THIS IS IT.

I was so nervous. I went back to the clinic....stopped by the bathroom just because I was so nervous and emptied my bladder. Checked in and sat down, waiting for my name to be called. I literally was shaking...I couldn't breathe, I was nervous. I had my legs crossed because I thought that would help...but, it didn't. I started shaking profusely. Then, they called my name BUT it wasn't Ultrasound...it was the lab, they wanted to do blood work first because I guess US was super busy. Great. JUST GET ON WITH IT. ha.

They took my blood and put me back in the waiting room...about 10 minutes later, Heather, my fav US tech called me back. You know the drill, get nakey, sit on table, use sheet, etc. When she came back, she brought in a nurse I didn't even know...yet again. Her name was Sue. I remember this time. It was someone I had never seen before. She talked very loud. I could tell she was rude from the get go, but I tried to just smile through it and tell myself there were bigger and better things out there and to not stress out about the dumb nurse. I even complimented her sweater but she didn't seem to care. Heather started to do the ultrasound and made a funny face....she told me I would have to go to the bathroom again so she could get an accurate reading/view...and I told her I literally just went. But...I got dressed again, went out to the bano, emptied my bladder, got back into the room, got undressed again, and sat my ass on the table. By this time, I was just aggravated. Sue and Heather came back in and the procedure went on as planned...I watched the monitor, the mm's went up...4mm, 5mm....6mm....7mm. And that was that. 7MM on the nose. I was excited but bummed. The last time I was in...I was over 7mm and now, when I was hoping for more, I was barely at 7. BUT, Heather told me it looked great... there was a tiny bit of fluid but not enough to even measure. Sue, basically yelled at me and said, OK - you're good to go. Start your Progesterone and we'll see you next week. Then she got ready to leave.

I looked at her and said, "EXCUSE ME!? What the HECK are you talking about? What do I do? What's going on?" She basically looked at me like I was a fricken idiot and said, "Didn't anyone go over this with you??" I basically told her NO, no one told me anything...I don't know what is going on. They wanted me to wait until today to basically see if we were even going to move forward. I wanted to bitch slap her. What a  ass. I told her she needed to tell me what to do, what was going on, what dates, meds, etc. I needed to have. She literally looked at my with a blank stare...then proceeded to say, "Well, I can draw on your circles if you want for your PIO shots." I looked her straight in the eyes and said, "Really, Sue? IF you read my files, you would've known we've been doing estrogen injections for the last two months." After that, I left knowing that someone would call me this afternoon after Dr. C reviewed the details.

That afternoon Theresa called me and literally apologized for Sue and how she treated me. I basically told her it wasn't the best experience and would prefer to have someone involved in my case that cared and knew about what was going on. She then proceeded to tell me what to do. Start my PIO on Friday - 1 ml daily. Continue my estradiol valerate 0.6 ml twice a week. Continue with my 81 mg of baby aspirin daily. Start my Doxycycline on Sunday, twice daily with food for 4 days. Also, find a prenatal and start taking that daily as well.

They wanted me to come back in on Day 20, just for a last lining check to ensure everything was where it should be. Then on Day 21, March 9th...we would do a frozen embryo transfer! Oh my gosh you guys...we are here. ALMOST.

Day 1 (February 18, 2016)

As soon as I had my bleed, I went back into the clinic to have my base ultrasound done for my the start of our official FET. I couldn't believe it, I wanted time to move so quickly and jump ahead to Day 14, Day 21, etc. But, unfortunately, that's not how life works...and patience is a virtue.
So, again, I was called back, got nakey and probed for the beginning of the REAL CYCLE. My lining was good and low...we got the go to start up the injections and get things done. I couldn't believe this was happening but in the back of my head, I was still having doubts, concerns, worries...my lining worked a couple times before and then it just decided to stop doing what it was supposed to. What would I do if it decided to do that again?? But, come back to the real world, Joy...seriously, I can't control everything...breathe.

My next visit would be on Day 14....this is when they would check my lining to make sure it's still good and then proceed with the next steps. No one would give me many details on what would happen...they kept saying, "Let's just get to Day 14 and go from there." So, I just agreed, put a big smile on my face and faced the day! I also added some more holistic help from Miss N to calm my nerves....nothing like some needles to ease my stress!

Vday

As you know, I started injectable estrace...it wasn't bad at all and became a routine. I even traveled to AZ to see my bestie and it all went just fine, she even helped with the shot (she's a PT, so her medical background was an added benefit :)). The doc wanted me to come back in on Day 14 to check my lining with this new protocol. Again, I was so nervous...but, tried to stay calm and just breathe. I went back into the clinic the day before my 30th birthday, February 1st. I checked in, sat down....same old, same old. When the ultra sound tech called me back, I walked into the room and she went to go get a nurse. I stripped down, got on the table, and covered the goods with the pressed, white sanitized bed sheet. The tech and a nurse came back in the room, thankfully it was Theresa...the nurse who actually tried and cared about what was going on.

They stuck that lovely stick up my vajayjay and I didn't want to look at the screen, but I did (of course). As she was measuring...the mm's kept going up and up...4mm, 5mm, 6mm.....7mm.....7.4MM!!! My lining was at 7.4MM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Both the tech and Theresa said, "WELL, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!"

7.4MM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I couldn't believe it...I cried. I asked what does this mean?? What's happening next?? What is going on??? They told me that the injections were working and now the doctor would have to review everything to determine the next steps. I asked myself, could we do a transfer next week???? So, I went back to work and waited. I waited for the call, I waited for the next steps. I couldn't believe it...I was so relieved that we didn't switch clinics, that we didn't doubt our doctors, that we just kept moving...and didn't give up.

Theresa called that afternoon and told me that Dr. C would like me to have a bleed and start up again on the injections. They want to actually do my frozen embryo transfer next month!! Honestly, I was hoping they would've told me that I could start my PIO Shots right away and do the transfer next week, but next month will be just A-OK!

So, I followed their protocol....stopped the meds and had a bleed. But, we went out for Valentine's Day like it was our last hooooo-rah! We went downtown, had a fancy dinner, rented a hotel room and had a little staycation! Best. VDAY. EVER.